Movie Review: ‘Lights Out’ Won’t Stay With You Long, But It Works For A Summer Horror Flick

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Dinner with your family. A hug from a stranger. Katy Perry songs. A stick of Fruit Stripe gum.

What do they all have in common? They’re all acceptable for a short amount of time. Lights Out started as a short film directed by David F. Sandberg, and it was an outstanding one. Coming in at just under three minutes, the simple premise managed to find a large audience and it ended up going viral. The buzz surrounding the short film got the attention of some powerful producers in Hollywood, and now three years later Sandberg is making his major directorial debut with an extended version of the short.

Did it deliver? Or will you leave the theater wanting to suffocate yourself with that plastic bag Katy Perry is always singing about?

The film starts out with a satisfying nod to the actress (Lotta Losten) who starred in the original short film. Just like in the short, we see her working that light switch. Turn the light off, the creature appears. Turn the light on, and the creature disappears. Sounds simple enough, right? Just keep the lights on and you’ll never have to worry about getting mauled by Diana.

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Yeah, Diana. The creature has a name, and it (she?) also has a surprisingly deep backstory. Most movie monsters are monsters because, well, the movie needs a monster. It’s like when you order a shake from a fast food restaurant and they dump a pound of whipped cream on top. Ask why they did it, and they’ll say, “I dunno…shakes need whipped cream,” and you accept that answer because no one wants to be that ungrateful customer complaining about receiving extra sweets for free.

Diana is more than just whipped cream though. She’s a friend. A childhood friend of Sophie (Maria Bello), the disturbed mother of Rebecca (Teresa Palmer) and Martin (Gabriel Bateman). As the events play out, we learn that Sophie and Diana were both treated at the same mental hospital when they were children. Diana had some rare skin disorder that made her sensitive to light. Any exposure to it would cause extreme pain and disfigurement. Doctors at the hospital tried to fix the condition by basically treating her like a human Hot Pocket and blowing her up in a microwave-like setting.

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Ever since then, Diana has been haunting Sophie and killing her husbands, but she never touched Martin and Rebecca because Sophie wouldn’t allow it. That all changes when Rebecca and Martin attempt to save their mom by trying to force her to take her medications to get her back to a healthier state of mind. A mind strong enough to fight off Diana.

As you might expect, things don’t go as planned. The same style of scares are repeated throughout the movie, so you shouldn’t go in expecting to jump out of your seat. There are several chill-inducing moments though, and they are mixed with some genuinely funny moments. There are at least two scenes in the film that had the entire theater laughing as if they were watching a comedy. And just to be clear here, they weren’t laughing AT the movie.

They were laughing with it.

It wasn’t all good though. Lights Out is sprinkled with cliches, the story felt a little rushed at times, and while Rebecca’s boyfriend Bret (Alexander DiPersia) provided most of the laughs, his constant need for reassurance during the worst times got a bit tiring.

Overall, it’s a decent horror flick with a powerful ending, and you won’t need a plastic bag after you leave the theater. But you’ll probably want to leave the light on for a few nights. You know, just in case Diana is real.

 

4star

(4/7 on the Gary Busey rating system, which refuses to end at 5 like normal rating systems)

 

Movie Review: Point Break – It’s Exhaustion With No Investment

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Patrick Swayze is spinning in his grave. Sorry, I couldn’t find a more socially acceptable way to describe this travesty. Before I get started on the unnecessary remake of an awesome movie, I need to go off on a short rant.

Look, not all movies need to be remade. Sometimes, a movie is so friggen awesome the first time around, it could never be topped. Movies like Gone with the Wind, Casablanca, any of the Die Hards, etc. do not need remakes. If you must do a sequel, do a sequel. But when you remake an original, you’re pretty much saying one thing; “I think I can do this better.”

And on Point Break? No, you can’t.

The story is the same. FBI agent Johnny Utah (Luke Bracey) infiltrates teams of thrill seeking bank robbers run by Bodhi (Edgar Ramirez). Johnny works with the team through a series of stunts designed to gain their trust, before the inevitable showdown.

First time around? Shocking, compelling and psychologically gripping. This time around? An excuse to blow a couple million on stunts while missing the point of the original.

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See, the point of the original was to make us feel like Johnny, as he slowly starts to admire Bodhi for his ‘life to the fullest’ outlook. We’re supposed to dig the fact that he kind of gets away with it. This time around, Bodhi’s some kind of hippy who uses his stunts as a way to ‘honor the earth’’’’

Whatever the hell that means.

And as a result, we kind of hate the character, rather than just want to hate-screw him.

The director clearly wanted to up the ante on action, and as a result, lost the awesome story and the thing that made this movie good. It was unique in that Bodhi is an anti-hero. The fact that they jumped out of a damn plane didn’t make the movie special. It was the characters themselves.

In this one, they give us two subpar actors who aren’t that memorable and look homeless, though not in the cool, hipster way, but in the dirty “I Don’t Shave” way. These guys can’t act and you know that’s bad when I can actually say Keanu “One Facial Expression” Reeves did it better.

But he did.

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They tried really, really hard to make it thrilling, but they completely missed the charisma. I will say the action scenes looked good, but as I didn’t really care about either character, there was no tension for me. Just one loud scene after another.,

And there’s a lot of loud scenes. About 2 hours of them, in fact. Can someone explain to me why these guys took nearly the same amount of time to make this movie, while making it feel about 4 hours longer?

It’s exhaustion with no investment. The makers decided to focus on their extreme sports expertise while not spending a lot of time working the script. So if you’re considering Point Break, might I suggest you go back to 1991 and get the original? Because this one is not worth the watch.

WE GAVE IT: 2 Stars – Watch the Official Trailer and Official Movie Poster below!

2 Stars

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Watch The First Full Trailer For The Insane ‘Point Break’ Remake

Here we go again. The Point Break remake is here, and it looks like it will be even more extreme than the original 1991 film starring Keanu Reeves. It also looks like it’s going to be more serious than the original film, which is a little scary. We didn’t see a lot of humor in this first trailer.

But we did see several extreme sports featured. Surfing, snowboarding, rock climbing, high-speed motorcycling, and maybe even bowling without the proper shoes.

The film stars Luke Bracey, Edgar Ramirez, Teresa Palmer, and Ray Winstone, and is scheduled to hit theaters Christmas Day. Buy an extra ticket for your grandmother. It’ll be a great way to thank her for the awesome socks she gave you.

Check out the official synopsis and trailer below…

“In Alcon Entertainment’s fast-paced, high-adrenaline action thriller “Point Break,” a young FBI agent, Johnny Utah (Luke Bracey), infiltrates a cunning team of thrill seeking elite athletes, led by the charismatic Bodhi (Edgar Ramirez). The athletes are suspected of carrying out a string of staggering crimes that kill innocent people and send the world’s economy into a tailspin. Deep undercover, and with his life in imminent danger, Utah strives to prove they are the callous architects of these inconceivable crimes.”

 

 
 

OFFICIAL POINT BREAK 2015 MOVIE POSTER
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