Movie Review: A Haunted House 2 (2014)

a_haunted_house_2_movie_poster_2Who even owns a rubber chicken?

2 Stars

It’s frightening, in a bad way, and funny in a bad way as well. Marlon Wayans’ comedy “A Haunted House” initially made about $40 million at the box office, so of course he’s going to latch on to that franchise. A Haunted House 2, which, like the nearly identical first one, parodies other popular horror films including “Dark Skies” and the “Last Exorcism” movies, among a long list of others.

We meet Malcolm (Wayans) as he is moving into his new home with girlfriend, Megan (Jaime Pressly). This is after his last girlfriend from “A Haunted House,” the demonically possessed Kisha (Essence Atkins), (SPOILER ALERT) has died in a car wreck. Megan has a young son, who of course spits more profanities than a trucker (Steele Stebbins), and a super trampy daughter, Becky (Ashley Rickards). The house has other residents as well. There’s evil unseen play mate Tony (think “Paranormal Activity 3”), and Abigail, an evil doll (think any movie with an evil doll) — and countless surveillance cameras. Malcolm gets his neighbor (Gabriel Iglesias), as well as married exorcists (Missi Pyle and Hayes MacArthur); and his friend Father Williams (Cedric the Entertainer, back from the last installment) to help.

For some reason, this movie is a lot like a middle aged woman who’s never been married in a single’s bar; shrill, needy and desperate to prove it’s having a good time. This combination doesn’t work for women or movies.


Relentless pop culture references abound and the movie is one parody after another. It makes me long for the days where the Wayans would write a move and stick to one general parody, rather than pile them on top of each other until they were barely decipherable.

As far as laughs goes, A Haunted House 2 misses. When they can’t squeeze out laughs doing to 800 different plot lines, stuffed in to fit the jokes, they just do something gross. Seriously, I did not need to see an adult man have relations with a doll.

All the actors are back, and they seem woefully unaware of the how terrible their movie is. They play their oblivious parts easily, and don’t seem to realize that the gag just isn’t funny anymore.

Thanks to teenage boys, the Wayans will stay in business until the day they die, as long as they keep spitting out one tired, overstuffed movie after another. It doesn’t feel like their trying anymore.



These movies are box office gold, because they can be done on a minimal budget, and bring in a ton of cash. Based on how many times Wayans’ wrestled with inanimate objects as part of the big scene, I can only guess that the prop budget was around $8.

Who even owns a rubber chicken?

A Haunted House 2 is nothing more than yet another installment of a hauntingly obvious cash grab. The jokes don’t land, the plots are recycled, and all they characters play like oversexed stereotypes with brain damage. Once you leave the theater, you’ll be finding yourself saying “yeah, that was a Wayans’ movie all right”.  Here is the official trailer below:

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