Movie Review: The Perfect Match – A Solid C-Plus Effort that is Safe First Date fare

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As eager to please as a never married woman with a ticking biological clock who’s approaching 40, the perfect match is the perfect cliché of “can a happy bachelor ditch the one night stands to find true love?” Of course, when it comes to ‘rom-coms’ the answer is “absolutely!” and not, “he’ll probably be hitting on nurses in his nursing home in 40 years.”

In The Perfect Match, Charlie (Terrence J) uses his unmatched charm and looks to sleep with the most attractive women in L.A. Worried that Charlie will never open himself up to a loving relationship, his friends Rick (Donald Faison) and Victor (Robert Christopher Riley) challenge him to date only one woman for the weeks leading up to Victor’s approaching wedding. Charlie accepts, and immediately pursues Eva (Cassie Ventura). Upon first meeting, Charlie reveals he only has short-term relationships, while Eva tells him she’s only been in long-term ones, but is looking to switch things up and have more fun. As you can probably guess from here, Charlie finds himself falling for Eva, proving his friends right.

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I will say this movie is what it is. It’s the standard rom-com theme. I mean, what do we love more than a bachelor we can reform, right? So it’s a safe bet that this makes a good, if not entirely unique, story. The story takes a unique twist in the end, but for the most part, remains formulaic and predictable.

As if to make up for the predictable main plot, The Perfect Match is bogged down with a slew of uninteresting B-stories. Each member of Charlie’s friend group has his or her own bit of turmoil we explore in depth: Rick and Pressie (Dascha Polanco) are trying desperately to have a baby; Victor and Ginger (Lauren London) aren’t seeing eye to eye on how much money to spend on their wedding. On top of that, Charlie is trying to sign French Montana (who appears as himself) to his agency in connection to some new app he’s developing, and Charlie’s sister Sherry (Paula Patton) is confronting him about never coming to terms with the death of their parents. Oh yeah, both of his parents died in a manner that is never explained.

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The attempt to make the story more interesting with more plots just means that the story of the two main characters gets lost entirely. This was a mistake, as I think the two leads were compelling enough to carry it on their own. I think if they’d just left it at that, it would have been a comfortable movie, though not groundbreaking. It doesn’t look like that was what they were going for.

So it will make your head spin, but it’s still light entertainment. This movie is a solid C plus effort that is safe first date fare, if not entirely original. A compelling cast makes it worth watching, if you just want to watch attractive people have drama. You won’t be any smarter for it, but it’s still a way to waste an evening.
WE GAVE IT: 3.5 Stars – Watch the Official Trailer and Official Movie Poster below!

4 stars

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Movie Review: 50 Shades of Black – Too Messy, Too Disorganized and Just Plain Not Funny Enough

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Don’t get me wrong, 50 Shades of Grey is a movie that was ripe for parody. The problem is the original material is already so bad, it was a parody of itself. But Marlin Wayans tried, and wound up with a movie that was too messy, too disorganized and just plain not funny enough to be an enjoyable parody.

I think one of the big problems was Wayans had ADD. He seems unable to just contain a parody to one movie, the way a parody should be contained. Instead, he felt the need to shove in stuff from Magic Mike, Whiplash…and Zero Dark Thirty? Come on, I know it’s parody, but pick a movie, or at the very least, a GENRE and stick with it.

The movie is exactly what you’d expect from a Wayans movie; tons of dick jokes, homophobia, homo erotica and more than a few gross out gags. I’m sure teen boys will find that stuff great.

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But what annoyed me the most was there was actually some clever, original stuff thrown in there, from Hannah’s butt implants, to Black reading aloud from the actual book in a mocking tone, to Hannah whipping Christian, declaring “this is for Kerry Washington in Django Unchained, and Lupita Nyong’o in 12 Years a Slave …” there were a few moments that actually made me laugh out loud.

Which is why it was so annoying to see the majority of it tied up in those stupid, adolescent jokes. Every now and then, the movie will slip in a gem and remind you of what parody is supposed to be. This movie has the set up, and the potential to be hilarious, but instead, it looks like this was a phone in job, aimed at an undiscerning all male—and teenage—audience.

Remember back when Wayans used to make good parodies? Like the first Scary Movie, and…and…yeah, that was about it. He should do that again. Not another Scary Movie, I mean. Please God, no. He should take one movie, stick to the script and make it funny, rather than use the script as an excuse to tie in unrelated movies and jokes.

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Just having Morgan Freeman read the book on tape over a black screen would have been funnier than this.

The literary market is already chock full of spoofs on 50 Shades of Grey. I think adapting any single one of those novels that followed the true parody formula, would have been better. This feels like a slapdash attempt to fill a filler movie with more filler.

Because that’s what 50 Shades of Grey was, sex scenes with filler story in between those sex scenes. It feels like it was just written on the fly, like I’m watching an improve sketch. Improv was over in the 90’s. It’s time to move on.

I wanted to like 50 Shades of Black, simply because I didn’t like the book (or the movie) and was hoping I’d see it really get skewered, with the mean spirited humor you’d find in a Celebrity Roast. Instead, what I got was humor the style of a celebrity roast…where none of the good guests show up and The Situation is hosting.

As a result, I have to say not worth the watch.

WE GAVE IT: 2 Stars – Watch the Official Trailer and Official Movie Poster below!

2 Stars

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