Movie Review: 50 Shades of Black – Too Messy, Too Disorganized and Just Plain Not Funny Enough

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Don’t get me wrong, 50 Shades of Grey is a movie that was ripe for parody. The problem is the original material is already so bad, it was a parody of itself. But Marlin Wayans tried, and wound up with a movie that was too messy, too disorganized and just plain not funny enough to be an enjoyable parody.

I think one of the big problems was Wayans had ADD. He seems unable to just contain a parody to one movie, the way a parody should be contained. Instead, he felt the need to shove in stuff from Magic Mike, Whiplash…and Zero Dark Thirty? Come on, I know it’s parody, but pick a movie, or at the very least, a GENRE and stick with it.

The movie is exactly what you’d expect from a Wayans movie; tons of dick jokes, homophobia, homo erotica and more than a few gross out gags. I’m sure teen boys will find that stuff great.

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But what annoyed me the most was there was actually some clever, original stuff thrown in there, from Hannah’s butt implants, to Black reading aloud from the actual book in a mocking tone, to Hannah whipping Christian, declaring “this is for Kerry Washington in Django Unchained, and Lupita Nyong’o in 12 Years a Slave …” there were a few moments that actually made me laugh out loud.

Which is why it was so annoying to see the majority of it tied up in those stupid, adolescent jokes. Every now and then, the movie will slip in a gem and remind you of what parody is supposed to be. This movie has the set up, and the potential to be hilarious, but instead, it looks like this was a phone in job, aimed at an undiscerning all male—and teenage—audience.

Remember back when Wayans used to make good parodies? Like the first Scary Movie, and…and…yeah, that was about it. He should do that again. Not another Scary Movie, I mean. Please God, no. He should take one movie, stick to the script and make it funny, rather than use the script as an excuse to tie in unrelated movies and jokes.

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Just having Morgan Freeman read the book on tape over a black screen would have been funnier than this.

The literary market is already chock full of spoofs on 50 Shades of Grey. I think adapting any single one of those novels that followed the true parody formula, would have been better. This feels like a slapdash attempt to fill a filler movie with more filler.

Because that’s what 50 Shades of Grey was, sex scenes with filler story in between those sex scenes. It feels like it was just written on the fly, like I’m watching an improve sketch. Improv was over in the 90’s. It’s time to move on.

I wanted to like 50 Shades of Black, simply because I didn’t like the book (or the movie) and was hoping I’d see it really get skewered, with the mean spirited humor you’d find in a Celebrity Roast. Instead, what I got was humor the style of a celebrity roast…where none of the good guests show up and The Situation is hosting.

As a result, I have to say not worth the watch.

WE GAVE IT: 2 Stars – Watch the Official Trailer and Official Movie Poster below!

2 Stars

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Movie Review: The Wedding Ringer – tries way too hard to be outrageous and comes off stupid.

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When I checked out the Wedding Ringer, I was hoping for a movie like “I Love You Man.” It kind of has the same plot. A guy short a friend has to find a best man for his wedding day. Then, unfortunately it all goes terribly, terribly wrong.

Doug Harris (Josh Gad) is that socially awkward everyman with a problem. It’s two weeks to his wedding day and he doesn’t have a best man. Lucky Doug gets a referral to Jimmy Callahan (Kevin Hart), owner and CEO of Best Man, Inc. This company has one goal. Giving the perfect best man to guys just like Doug. Of course, what starts as a con becomes a budding bromance between Doug and his fake best man Jimmy.

A movie has to be really bad, to have Kevin Hart in it and still make me hate it. Hell, I sat though Soul Plane…and loved it. But this one fell flat.

Here’s the deal. If you’re going to make rape jokes, if your going to make child molestation jokes, if you’re going to have a ‘service dog’ lick peanut butter off of someone’s privates or light Granny on fire, it better damn well be funny. Not light chuckle funny. I’m talking Hangover, ‘guys stealing Mike Tyson’s tiger’ funny.

This was just awkward. The entire theater was filled with uncomfortable silence for a good hour and 41 minutes. Despite Kevin Hart’s usual energetic, motor mouth delivery, the movie just wasn’t redeemable. The moments where Jimmy and Doug bonded are too heavy handed and too on the nose. The movie goes from slapstick, to a ‘Hallmark Presents’ movie about two dudes falling in love.

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The comedy goes over the top, in an attempt to be something like Hangover, but they did it wrong. For the most part, we weren’t forced to watch the really raunchy, gross stuff on Hangover. Instead, they’d do the cut-away and leave it up to our imagination, making it even more funny.

This movie didn’t pull it off. It fact, much like its main character, it tried way too hard to be outrageous and just came off as stupid.

The sad thing is, Hart and Gad had some serious on screen chemistry. These two could easily have done a great movie together. They both have excellent lines and great delivery. The problems arose with the plot. I think half of it was lifted from clips of Hitch and Wedding Crashers. The other half was probably written while in a rush, after a night of binge drinking. Implausible plot turns and ridiculous shenanigans abound.

Of course, all the weird looking men in the movie find beautiful hotties at the end. Another implausible plot turn. When has anyone seen that reversed? Where a really ugly chick gets the hottest guy? Pretty much never. That’s because it doesn’t happen.

Kevin Hart was really the only thing that made this movie even palatable. Other than that, it was kind of a mess. I really wish that they’d written a script worthy of him. Hell, at this point, I would have been happy with Soul Plane 2.

WE GAVE IT : 3 STARS!  Watch the Official Trailer and See the Official Movie Poster below

stars

 

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