Movie Review: Homefront (2013)

homefont 001Home Front? I should have Stayed Home

2.5 Stars

If we have learned anything from movies, it is that all small towns are filled with drug dealers, serial killers, racists, ghosts, rampant child molesters and more. Based on the movies, most people would be safer living in South Station in Boston, rather than settling down in a sleepy small town. Enter Homefront.

Homefront is the story of a retired DEA Agent Phil Broker (Jason Statham) who moves to a small Louisiana town with his precocious, wise beyond her years, daughter Maddie (Izabela Vidovic). There, he does battle with Gator (James Franco) the boy next door drug lord, his trashy girlfriend (Winona Rider) and his white trash addict sister (Kate Bosworth)

The screenplay and the dialog were so poorly written, I was like ‘who the hell wrote this? Sylvester Stallone?’ Then I realized this was actually the case. This is an action movie that is clearly stuck in the 80’s, where the overreactions of the characters are necessary to move the plot forward.

For example, all the bloodshed starts because Broker’s 9-year-old daughter punched a boy in the nose. Then, Broker goes all alpha-male and starts smashing faces. Normally, not something I have a problem with. But if you’re going action, go all action.

Jesus Stallone, you should know this stuff by now! [more…]

Oh, God, and the dialog. Let’s be honest, I’m hardly expecting Shakespeare, but can’t anyone get a few good wisecracking lines, like in “The Last Boyscout’? In one scene, Broker warns “I want Middies’ cat back…not a hair out of place.” There was an endless opportunity for humor and some serious double entendre in there, but Stallone didn’t seem to get there. There is 0 comic relief and 0 clever dialog in this clichéd clusterf&8k.

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Also, the filming could have been done better. In the required action movie climactic scene, you can’t really see a thing. All you can do is hear it. The climax is a weird, writhing Greco Roman fighting match, played out in the dark, which will make most people wonder if they’re actually watching gay porn.

I’m sick of darkly serious action movies. Come on producers, we’re not looking for an Oscar film. This isn’t the King’s Speech. This is action. Have some fun. Give me some catch phrases.

Instead of giving me a lackluster Jason Statham, with zero charisma and zero emotion. At best, Stratham is the partner that gets killed 3 days before his retirement. He is not leading man material. Also, not buying James Franco as a bad guy, Kate Bosworth as an addict, and I wasn’t even aware the Winona Rider was still alive.

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In short, Homefront will make you wish you had stayed at home. If Stallone is looking to revise 80’s style action flicks, might I suggest more “Beverly Hills Cop’ and less “Roadhouse”. Give the audience a little relief from the tension now and then, and give me a leading man that I actually like. In Homefront, I didn’t really care if Broker made it or not. Hell, I didn’t even care about his cat.

Watch the trailer below.

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